February 05, 2008
Spread the Love at the February Blog Carnival
I swear, I'm going to put up a post called, "Meme Madness." In it, I will update the "linky love" I've been trying to keep up on and spread for those bloggers playing my Survivor Needs & Wants meme. Then, I'll try to make sure I put up my own lists for the memes I've been tagged with lately.
Right now, however, I've got to let you all know what's going on with the Blog Carnival Against Child Abuse. I've decided just to take February myself. Since February is Valentine's Day month here in the US, let's do a "love theme" for this edition. Submit posts about learning to love and trust again after abuse, loving and forgiving yourself, loving your inner child or alter parts, etc. Let's spread the love, y'all!
I've set the submission deadline as Wednesday, Feb 13 for a Friday, Feb 15 edition post. You can submit here.
Now, as for future hosts, I'm a little mixed up. Me, mixed up? Never, right? I know I had several would-be first-time hosts who told me they wanted to wait until spring to be in charge of an edition. One blogger, unfortunately, had to pull her blog down. I'm pretty sure Enola and S'onnie told me they were looking at the possibility of hosting in March. Mike, at Child Abuse Survivor said he'd be willing to host again anytime. Then, I think April at Thriver's Toolbox told me she may be able to host in the not-too-distant future, but I can't remember when.
I know I'm forgetting at least a couple of people who showed interest. I'd like to give the first-time carnival hosts a chance before we go back again to repeat hosties. If you're interested, would you please comment here and let me know a possible month you may be able to host? I'd like to get a host list compiled to get us through to at least June. Thanks. I'd sure appreciate it.
Right now, however, I've got to let you all know what's going on with the Blog Carnival Against Child Abuse. I've decided just to take February myself. Since February is Valentine's Day month here in the US, let's do a "love theme" for this edition. Submit posts about learning to love and trust again after abuse, loving and forgiving yourself, loving your inner child or alter parts, etc. Let's spread the love, y'all!
I've set the submission deadline as Wednesday, Feb 13 for a Friday, Feb 15 edition post. You can submit here.
Now, as for future hosts, I'm a little mixed up. Me, mixed up? Never, right? I know I had several would-be first-time hosts who told me they wanted to wait until spring to be in charge of an edition. One blogger, unfortunately, had to pull her blog down. I'm pretty sure Enola and S'onnie told me they were looking at the possibility of hosting in March. Mike, at Child Abuse Survivor said he'd be willing to host again anytime. Then, I think April at Thriver's Toolbox told me she may be able to host in the not-too-distant future, but I can't remember when.
I know I'm forgetting at least a couple of people who showed interest. I'd like to give the first-time carnival hosts a chance before we go back again to repeat hosties. If you're interested, would you please comment here and let me know a possible month you may be able to host? I'd like to get a host list compiled to get us through to at least June. Thanks. I'd sure appreciate it.
Labels: Blog Carnival Against Child Abuse, blog carnivals, inner child, links, love, meme, parts, survivor, survivor needs, trust
January 22, 2008
Life Happens!
I had another post stared yesterday that involved shame--something I'm working on in T lately. It was hard to get much done, as my son was home with the MLK birthday holiday yesterday.
I've gotten tagged with a couple more memes (that's what I get, huh?) and I also wanted to continue to update the "linky love" on bloggers who are playing the Survivor Needs Meme.
But, guess what? My husband's car got broken into last night and I've been dealing with that all morning. The police aren't even sending anyone out because there aren't any suspects. This type of thing doesn't help much in the constant struggle to convince my little parts that they are now safe. Grrrrrrrr!
I've gotten tagged with a couple more memes (that's what I get, huh?) and I also wanted to continue to update the "linky love" on bloggers who are playing the Survivor Needs Meme.
But, guess what? My husband's car got broken into last night and I've been dealing with that all morning. The police aren't even sending anyone out because there aren't any suspects. This type of thing doesn't help much in the constant struggle to convince my little parts that they are now safe. Grrrrrrrr!
Labels: crime, meme, safety, shame, survivor needs
January 16, 2008
Survivor Community aka Linky Love
I've got so much going on in therapy right now I can hardly keep it straight. I've got one of those parts "flowcharts" thingies and it needs to be updated big time. Lately I've worked with a tiny little part who can barely talk. An older part translated for her and we found out about very early trauma involving potty training. Very recently, I worked with an older, rebellious part who used to really scare me. She was actually very patient in showing me why she thought she could protect me through a tough, lack-of-caring persona.
That's about all I can say about T right now without my brain exploding, so I'll go on to something a bit lighter...but also important to our survivor community, me thinks, folks!
So far, I think about 40 blogging survivors have been tagged with the Survivor Needs & Wants Meme that I started. There have even been a few bloggers that got tagged more than once. Of the people I originally tagged, most survivor-bloggers thanked me for including them and seemed to find the exercise enjoyable, or at least helpful for their healing. (I'm not going to lie to you; this is a tough assignment!)
The Memory Artist at Why Can't The Past Just Die? commented, "Thank you for including me. I'm not so good about memes, but I like this one." As promised, this blogger gave the meme some thought and played along. Karma, at Jew Exploring Buddhism, also played and said, "Thanks Marj! It was helpful to write that." She included over a dozen wants on her list. You go, girl!
Even before Patricia Singleton (of Spiritual Journey of a Lightworker) played, the meme got her focused on her own self-care. She said, "I decided that one of the things I need tonight is to spend some loving time with my husband instead of making a cake that no one is expecting me to make. My cooking is over for this holiday. " Good job, Patricia! We can unlearn that childhood programming! When Patricia introduced her meme blog post, she went on to say, "Survivors are notorious for taking care of everybody but themselves. Didn't you know we are dispensable. At least our needs are. That is what I was taught as a child."
Enola played and tagged five. So far, Austin at The People Behind My Eyes and Beauty at Beautiful Dreamer have both played along. I think they both got tagged by more than one bloggy buddy--you popular peeps! I think Austin even had a commenter who thought the list was so good, they wanted to print it out. But, hey guys--you haven't tagged anyone yet. It's not too late to spread the linky love! I know JIP at Life Spacings said she would play while she's on holiday. I hope she joins us.
You know, it's really not about spreading the links (although, I love to do that for bloggers--as I'm doing here), it's about spreading awareness. "And they'll tell two friends, and they'll tell two friends." I think the slogan on that old shampoo commercial was something like that. The survivor community, advocacy and awareness thing really does grow exponentially. And we can do it with just a little something like this meme. Actually, if we all tag people, it will go: "And they'll tell five friends, and they'll tell five friends."
I think the survivor blogger who played this meme and really got the ball rolling like this the fastest was The Memory Artist. And she was the one who said she was late: "Better late than never I guess." Let me pause for a second to make a very strong point: I meant for this meme to be something for us to think about in the New Year. It's still January, guys; it's not too late to play. And it's never to late to raise awareness!
But, anyway, the way The Memory Artist got the ball rolling is so cool, because I'm getting to know some new bloggers! One of MA's bloggy buddies, Mother Wintermoon at Romancing the Crone jumped on our bandwagon and said, "Wow. I very rarely do memes, but this one went straight to my heart and touched my core. This is an exceptional meme as a healing and releasing exercise for survivors, for a vitally important cause. I'm going to work on mine and link back to you. I will post it in a few days. Thank you for creating this meme."
Another one of the Memory Artist's friends, Denise, commented, "This is the best meme ever!" Wow, thanks, Denise. I notice that she mentions she needs privacy, so, while I thank her, I don't know if she played the meme herself and I'm not going to link to her.
This reminds me of another point I want to pause to make/remind everybody of: You don't have to wait to be tagged to play this meme! Just hop on this train and take a ride with us!
Mother Wintermoon changed her list of survivor needs to a list of "I am" affirmations, which I thought was brilliant! Go to the comments section of her post and check out the lively, loving, affirming dialogue there. At the end of Mother Wintermoon's meme post, she says something I really appreciate: "PS I’ve never said this before about any post I’ve written or seen, but if you see or know an abuse survivor doing this meme (it’s not easy to do), don’t just silently go on your way, blogging about love, peace, human-kindness, world healing, and higher consciousness. Be what you blog, walk the talk, practice what you preach. Let him or her know you’re there and you care."
That's about all I can say about T right now without my brain exploding, so I'll go on to something a bit lighter...but also important to our survivor community, me thinks, folks!
So far, I think about 40 blogging survivors have been tagged with the Survivor Needs & Wants Meme that I started. There have even been a few bloggers that got tagged more than once. Of the people I originally tagged, most survivor-bloggers thanked me for including them and seemed to find the exercise enjoyable, or at least helpful for their healing. (I'm not going to lie to you; this is a tough assignment!)
The Memory Artist at Why Can't The Past Just Die? commented, "Thank you for including me. I'm not so good about memes, but I like this one." As promised, this blogger gave the meme some thought and played along. Karma, at Jew Exploring Buddhism, also played and said, "Thanks Marj! It was helpful to write that." She included over a dozen wants on her list. You go, girl!
Even before Patricia Singleton (of Spiritual Journey of a Lightworker) played, the meme got her focused on her own self-care. She said, "I decided that one of the things I need tonight is to spend some loving time with my husband instead of making a cake that no one is expecting me to make. My cooking is over for this holiday. " Good job, Patricia! We can unlearn that childhood programming! When Patricia introduced her meme blog post, she went on to say, "Survivors are notorious for taking care of everybody but themselves. Didn't you know we are dispensable. At least our needs are. That is what I was taught as a child."
Enola played and tagged five. So far, Austin at The People Behind My Eyes and Beauty at Beautiful Dreamer have both played along. I think they both got tagged by more than one bloggy buddy--you popular peeps! I think Austin even had a commenter who thought the list was so good, they wanted to print it out. But, hey guys--you haven't tagged anyone yet. It's not too late to spread the linky love! I know JIP at Life Spacings said she would play while she's on holiday. I hope she joins us.
You know, it's really not about spreading the links (although, I love to do that for bloggers--as I'm doing here), it's about spreading awareness. "And they'll tell two friends, and they'll tell two friends." I think the slogan on that old shampoo commercial was something like that. The survivor community, advocacy and awareness thing really does grow exponentially. And we can do it with just a little something like this meme. Actually, if we all tag people, it will go: "And they'll tell five friends, and they'll tell five friends."
I think the survivor blogger who played this meme and really got the ball rolling like this the fastest was The Memory Artist. And she was the one who said she was late: "Better late than never I guess." Let me pause for a second to make a very strong point: I meant for this meme to be something for us to think about in the New Year. It's still January, guys; it's not too late to play. And it's never to late to raise awareness!
But, anyway, the way The Memory Artist got the ball rolling is so cool, because I'm getting to know some new bloggers! One of MA's bloggy buddies, Mother Wintermoon at Romancing the Crone jumped on our bandwagon and said, "Wow. I very rarely do memes, but this one went straight to my heart and touched my core. This is an exceptional meme as a healing and releasing exercise for survivors, for a vitally important cause. I'm going to work on mine and link back to you. I will post it in a few days. Thank you for creating this meme."
Another one of the Memory Artist's friends, Denise, commented, "This is the best meme ever!" Wow, thanks, Denise. I notice that she mentions she needs privacy, so, while I thank her, I don't know if she played the meme herself and I'm not going to link to her.
This reminds me of another point I want to pause to make/remind everybody of: You don't have to wait to be tagged to play this meme! Just hop on this train and take a ride with us!
Mother Wintermoon changed her list of survivor needs to a list of "I am" affirmations, which I thought was brilliant! Go to the comments section of her post and check out the lively, loving, affirming dialogue there. At the end of Mother Wintermoon's meme post, she says something I really appreciate: "PS I’ve never said this before about any post I’ve written or seen, but if you see or know an abuse survivor doing this meme (it’s not easy to do), don’t just silently go on your way, blogging about love, peace, human-kindness, world healing, and higher consciousness. Be what you blog, walk the talk, practice what you preach. Let him or her know you’re there and you care."
Hooray for May at Sitting in the South! She didn't wait to get tagged, but jumped in off of Mother Wintermoon's post. I love the awareness May shows in her needs list, recognizing the great paradox of being human. Look what she says on her list: "To be taken seriously" and "To be taken with a grain of salt!" I love it! Thanks for joining us, May!
Okay, back to MA--The Memory Artist. She also tagged Roses on the Moon who has a wonderful, insightful list that oscillates between "we need" and "I need" to accommodate her unique system. MA also tagged Against Medical Advice, who wrote an amazing list that reads quite like a poem about friendship needs. Check it out!
MA also tagged KatM at Finding the Light in the Darkness who has a great, insightful list. I think the process had a great impact on her and she promises to write, in turn, about that. KatM tagged Natasha, who did an incredible, aware and insightful list. Great job for her first meme! Come to think of it, I think this is the first meme several people mentioned that they had ever played. How cool is that?
KatM also tagged JigsawAnalogy who has a really wonderful and unique list that's organized under categories such as "Courage," "Time," and "Support System." KatM was one of the folks who tagged Austin and Beauty--bloggers I know. She also tagged a blogging friend of mine, Keepers. (See, I knew you guys would get tagged by others, so I left that open!)
Keepers has a really wonderful list that mentions some needs I wish I had thought of. She also has a list that includes her system as a whole. I haven't seen that anyone Keepers tagged has played the meme yet, but three said they would: Wolfbaby, Silverylizard and Rising Rainbow. RR always has well-written, insightful posts, so I sure hope she plays. I'll also look forward to seeing what Wolf and Silverylizard have to say...and getting to know them better. Silverylizard commented, "hey keepers! ive been catching up on your posts, and saw i was tagged, so im going to start working on this mweme. i like memes, even though i get stuck trying to think of stuff sometimes. still, im excited to do this one."
Okay, so back to new bloggers I'm meeting--back to Jigsaw Analogy, who did the five tags. So far, I've just seen one blogger who's posted the meme so far off of this tag. But, this leads me back to yet another bloggy buddy, Fallen Angels at A Safe Place Dissociative Dialogue. I don't know what I think is cooler: meeting all these new, courageous and wonderful blogger survivors; or this "six degrees of separation" thing bringing me back to old friends! She's got another great list, and I really like how she "goes for it" on her wants list.
Which leads me, full circle, back to my original list of tagees. Some folks said they needed to give some thought to their personal survivor needs list, and I respect that. Did I mention that it's not too late to play (or to add your "tagged" list to your post if you haven't done that yet)? I'm very much looking forward to reading the personal, insightful interpretations of these fellow survivor bloggers who tell me they are going to play: Megan at Imaginif; Marcella at Abyss2Hope; and Annaleigh at As Waters Passing By/Blessed Fearscapes.
And they'll tell five friends, and they'll tell five friends...I love it! Thanks to all for joining us! We are strong, aware, advocating survivor-thrivers!
P.S. I almost forgot: I'm sure I'm forgetting somebody here--or there are people who have played that I have not yet discovered. If you have played this meme (or you know of a blogger who has) please comment here with a heads-up for me and I'll add them/you to my linky list! Thanks!
Update 1/17/08:
Yay! I got an e-mail from Annaleigh and a comment on my original meme post from Marcella. They have both given a lot of thought to their lists and have now posted them at their blogs. Go check out: Marcella's Needs & Wants list at Abyss2Hope and Annaleigh's list at As Waters Passing By/Blessed Fearscapes. Thanks, courageous bloggers! I admire and respect you so much...and appreciate you as well. :)
Labels: advocacy, awareness, community, meme, needs, self-care, survivors
December 22, 2007
I've Created a "Survivor Needs" Meme
This holiday season, many of us survivors are rushing around trying to get our gift shopping done and get all those items on our lists checked off. For some of us, the holidays are a painful time of triggers and obtrusive memories. Whether you hate Christmas, really get into the holiday spirit, or just tend to run yourself ragged this time of year, it's time to pay attention to some of your own needs.
I know! Let's make a list for ourselves and do it as a meme.
I've created a list of "Survivor Needs" and I've arranged them from 1-25, like an advent calendar counting down to the 25th day of December. I've also sprinkled in a few things that I, as a survivor and a human, just want! For your own list, maybe you need to pretend it's not the holidays. Maybe you can't tolerate touch (even cyber hugs), but you want some healing vibes sent your way. Maybe you don't feel comfortable telling your story, but you want others to know you are a survivor and not feel so alone.
This is your chance to communicate your own, personal survivor needs.
You don't have to wait to get tagged with this meme. Grab it and post a list of your own! Let's focus some attention on self care this holiday season...with an emphasis on getting our needs met in the New Year.
My Survivor Needs
As a survivor trying to thrive:
I know! Let's make a list for ourselves and do it as a meme.
I've created a list of "Survivor Needs" and I've arranged them from 1-25, like an advent calendar counting down to the 25th day of December. I've also sprinkled in a few things that I, as a survivor and a human, just want! For your own list, maybe you need to pretend it's not the holidays. Maybe you can't tolerate touch (even cyber hugs), but you want some healing vibes sent your way. Maybe you don't feel comfortable telling your story, but you want others to know you are a survivor and not feel so alone.
This is your chance to communicate your own, personal survivor needs.
You don't have to wait to get tagged with this meme. Grab it and post a list of your own! Let's focus some attention on self care this holiday season...with an emphasis on getting our needs met in the New Year.
My Survivor Needs
As a survivor trying to thrive:
- I need PEACE.
- I need some sleep!
- I need to feel safe in the shower and in my bed.
- I need rapport and effective work with a good therapist who cares.
- (Although I've often tried to do without them) I need anti-depressant meds and something for anxiety and sleep when I need it.
- I need to be silly and have some fun once in a while.
- I need to do safe, healthy anger work.
- I need to get in touch with my feelings.
- I need to be in my body.
- I need safe touch with trusted others and safe cyber hugs.
- I need to tell my story and know that I'm not alone.
- I need to advocate for and connect with other survivors, and raise awareness about sexual violence and abuse.
- I need soft, warm jammies, slipper socks, blankets, hoodies and throws.
- I need non-sexual touch and affection with my husband.
- I need to exercise assertiveness, boundaries and communication with others to keep myself safe.
- I need to get out in nature and know that all can be right with the world.
- I need to hold my child and feel his soft cheek against mine.
- I need a warm, furry pet.
- I need to comfort and re-parent my inner child.
- I need to renew my commitment to breaking the cycle...every day.
- I need to stay away from most of my family of origin--they are toxic!
- I need to continue to work on a healthy relationship with my sister.
- I need healthy self-esteem.
- I need to know that I am worth good things and I deserve them!
- I need to let you know that you're not alone either--I'm here and I care.
And, I also want (but don't necessarily need and/or might not ever have):
- I want coffee!
- I want chocolate!
- I want a cigarette (but I'm not going to have one).
- I want a pill that would eliminate my nightmares.
- I want to end all forms of sexual violence and child abuse everywhere, forever.
Rules of the "Survivor Needs" Meme:
- Please link back to this post so people can see the origins of the meme, get ideas for their own self-care list, see who's already been tagged, and maybe we can track how far this meme goes.
- List 25 needs and five wants. Try to restrict your needs list to things that have to do with being a survivor of some sort of abuse, assault, etc. Your wants list can be anything...you want!
- Use this list to remind yourself to get your needs met this holiday season and in the New Year.
- Pass on the meme and tag five people to play the meme with you. (I get to tag a few extra folks because, well, I started the meme, okay?)
I tag:
- Patricia Singleton at Spiritual Journey of a Lightworker
- Enola Survivor
- Lynn at Spilling Ink in Public
- Matthew at Loving Awareness
- Mike at Child Abuse Survivor
- Megan at Imaginif
- Marcella at Abyss2Hope
- Annaleigh at As Waters Passing By/Blessed Fearscapes
- Memory Artist
- Karma at Jew Exploring Buddhism
Note: Please don't be insulted if you don't see your name on this list. I've left some bloggers off on purpose because I want to give you the chance to tag (and I know you will anyway) each other.
Labels: advocacy, assault, assertiveness, awareness, chid abuse, holidays, medication, meme, needs, New Year, nightmares, self-care, sexual abuse survivors, sexual violence, therapy, thrive
December 04, 2007
When All Else Fails, Play a Meme!
I realize that, now that my fantasy/vacation time is over, I'm feeling overwhelmed. The holidays seem so close and I haven't even started my shopping yet. I've got a pile of catalogs stacked up next to my bed that I've skimmed through, but I haven't placed one order. If I don't hurry, I won't have time to wait on mail-order delivery.
Yesterday, my son was asking about our traditional advent calendar. It's a wooden job shaped like a house, with drawers that I fill with little treats. I realized, as I dug it out of the basement today, that we've already missed opening three drawers for the first three days of December. December?! How'd that happen?
I wish I was back in the Bahamas indulging in my big "Fantasyland" escape!
I know! A perfect way to procrastinate! A meme! I got tagged with this "ABC Meme" that's going around. I'm a little late, 'cause I got tagged while I was out of town. No worries--I'll just play now. Thanks, Beauty, for giving me the perfect vehicle for putting off all the things I need to do, but am not because I feel paralyzed with the ever-popular "overwhelm." Pathetic? Me? Ah, give me a break! I have a dissociative disorder.
Okay, here goes:
A ~ Available? Nope. Married for almost 15 years now.
B ~ Best friend: My hubby (I know it sounds corny, but it's true!)
C ~ Cake or pie? Pie.
D ~ Drink of choice: This time of year--hot spiced cider (not spiked, spiced).
E ~ Essential thing used every day: Vitamins/supplements and lots of water!
F ~ Favorite color: Purple.
G ~ Gummi bears or worms? Neither. If it's not chocolate, why bother?
H ~ Hometown: (I feel weird listing this one, because as a kid I never really had a "Home.") Technically: Wheaton, Illinois.
I ~ Indulgence: Chocolate.
J ~ January or February? January, because that's when my New Year's Day baby (my son) was born!
K ~ Kids and names: Daniel.
L ~ Life is incomplete without: Nature.
M ~ Marriage date: 1984 and 1993.
N ~ Number of siblings: 2.
O ~ Oranges or apples? Apples.
P ~ Phobias/fears: They're trauma related and I don't want to talk about it. I used to have a terrible fear of spiders, but I got over it.
Q ~ Favorite quote: "What lies behind us, and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us." ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson
R ~ Reason to smile: Acting silly with my hubby and/or son.
S ~ Season: Fall.
T ~ Tag three people: Enola, April, Rising Rainbow.
U ~ Unknown fact about me: Some people still don't know that I'm an identical twin.
V ~ Vegetable you don't like: Lima beans.
W ~ Worst habit: Clenching my teeth.
X ~ X-rays you've had: finger, toe, back, chest x-rays for bronchitis.
Y ~ Your favorite food: ice cream (or chocolate...or both).
Z ~ Zodiac: Scorpio.
Yesterday, my son was asking about our traditional advent calendar. It's a wooden job shaped like a house, with drawers that I fill with little treats. I realized, as I dug it out of the basement today, that we've already missed opening three drawers for the first three days of December. December?! How'd that happen?
I wish I was back in the Bahamas indulging in my big "Fantasyland" escape!
I know! A perfect way to procrastinate! A meme! I got tagged with this "ABC Meme" that's going around. I'm a little late, 'cause I got tagged while I was out of town. No worries--I'll just play now. Thanks, Beauty, for giving me the perfect vehicle for putting off all the things I need to do, but am not because I feel paralyzed with the ever-popular "overwhelm." Pathetic? Me? Ah, give me a break! I have a dissociative disorder.
Okay, here goes:
A ~ Available? Nope. Married for almost 15 years now.
B ~ Best friend: My hubby (I know it sounds corny, but it's true!)
C ~ Cake or pie? Pie.
D ~ Drink of choice: This time of year--hot spiced cider (not spiked, spiced).
E ~ Essential thing used every day: Vitamins/supplements and lots of water!
F ~ Favorite color: Purple.
G ~ Gummi bears or worms? Neither. If it's not chocolate, why bother?
H ~ Hometown: (I feel weird listing this one, because as a kid I never really had a "Home.") Technically: Wheaton, Illinois.
I ~ Indulgence: Chocolate.
J ~ January or February? January, because that's when my New Year's Day baby (my son) was born!
K ~ Kids and names: Daniel.
L ~ Life is incomplete without: Nature.
M ~ Marriage date: 1984 and 1993.
N ~ Number of siblings: 2.
O ~ Oranges or apples? Apples.
P ~ Phobias/fears: They're trauma related and I don't want to talk about it. I used to have a terrible fear of spiders, but I got over it.
Q ~ Favorite quote: "What lies behind us, and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us." ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson
R ~ Reason to smile: Acting silly with my hubby and/or son.
S ~ Season: Fall.
T ~ Tag three people: Enola, April, Rising Rainbow.
U ~ Unknown fact about me: Some people still don't know that I'm an identical twin.
V ~ Vegetable you don't like: Lima beans.
W ~ Worst habit: Clenching my teeth.
X ~ X-rays you've had: finger, toe, back, chest x-rays for bronchitis.
Y ~ Your favorite food: ice cream (or chocolate...or both).
Z ~ Zodiac: Scorpio.
Labels: holidays, meme, procrastination, vacation
October 10, 2007
Spreadin' The Love
I am so grateful that I wasn't forgotten while I was away, taking care of mental health and physical healing issues. I so appreciate being remembered by my bloggy friends. It helps so much to know I'm not alone and that I am the recipient of your warm empathy and compassion.
During my hiatus, I got tagged with two award memes: the Rockin' Girl Blogger and the Caring Blogger. I am honored, humbled and thankful. Thanks! :)
The Caring Blogger Award was created by my friend Marcella, at Abyss2Hope. Marcella is a tireless awareness-raiser and the founder of the Blog Carnival Against Sexual Violence. Marcella started this award meme to highlight bloggers who make us care. The rules and origins of this meme are here.
Here's my list of bloggers who make me care and help me keep my heart open (in no particular order):
During my hiatus, I got tagged with two award memes: the Rockin' Girl Blogger and the Caring Blogger. I am honored, humbled and thankful. Thanks! :)
The Caring Blogger Award was created by my friend Marcella, at Abyss2Hope. Marcella is a tireless awareness-raiser and the founder of the Blog Carnival Against Sexual Violence. Marcella started this award meme to highlight bloggers who make us care. The rules and origins of this meme are here.
Here's my list of bloggers who make me care and help me keep my heart open (in no particular order):
- Mike at Child Abuse Survivor
- Enola
- Jumping in Puddles at Life Spacings
- Al Johnson at Recovery Poetry/Wrong Words
- Dr. Deb
All of these caring bloggers have succeeded, through their writing, in making me care about them, personally, about child abuse prevention and about reducing the stigma of mental illness. They all raise awareness and make me want to stay aware myself--aware, involved and engaged.
I also got tagged by Enola with a Rockin' Girl Blogger award. I haven't been able to find out the origins of this meme, but I think it's cool. (Poo! I can't get the graphic for this award to load either. Anybody out there know how to help me with it?) Suffice it to say that I think the following girls really rock and I'm glad to know them through their blogs. Again, in no particular order:
- Karma at Jew Exploring Buddhism
- Cassie at Overcoming and Conquering CSA
- S'onnie at Yesterday, Today & Tomorrow
- Wanda at Wanda's Wings
- Patricia Singleton at Spiritual Journey of a Lightworker
Rock on, ladies! You rock our bloggy world!
Labels: award, awareness, child abuse prevention, meme, mental illness, stigma
July 09, 2007
Quick Update Before...
Well, I got a little bit behind on bloggy things with the 4th of July holiday, my son being home all the days long for summer vacation, and the distraction of this diet.
I'm pleased to say I'm holding at eight pounds lost. I've kept it off for over a week; no weight gain returning so far. (I'm no longer on this diet, but I've been making some "lifestyle" eating changes--that's what they say is the best strategy, right?) The thing that impressed me the most about this colon cleanse and diet (in addition to the fabulous relief of not feeling bloated all the time anymore) is the inches that melted away. On this program, they want you to measure yourself in the beginning and then again on day 11. In my last post I mentioned what I shock I had with measuring myself for the first time in years. On day 11, however, I got such a pleasant surprise!
I wouldn't have thought it possible in only 10 days with just eight pounds lost, but I got rid of some girth! I lost a half-inch each on my upper arms and bust; there was 3/4 of an inch each off my chunky upper thighs and waist; and most impressive of all--drum roll, please--was an inch and a 1/2 off my hips (including the lovely "love handle" area and gut). I still was not quite believing this until I noticed the change in how some of my clothes feel. Ya know, the clothes don't lie. Now, I can pull my waist band out from around my tummy like those models on the commercials do, and I've noticed some loose material around the rear end of my pants and shorts. Hooooraaayy!
Okay, enough about that. Thanks for indulging me.
The other thing that happened was the old, familiar survivor pattern that goes something like this: "Hey, you're feeling so much better, so good right now. You're probably up for a new abuse memory. You can handle it. Check it out!" Then, WHAM! A new part or memory taps me on the shoulder (or, more likely, bangs me over the head or kicks me in the ass). I may do a post on this therapy work later. Luckily, my cooperative part (her name is Samantha), my therapist and I did some great feelings work together and I feel better again. Thankfully, there is often relief after the hard recovery work.
Now, another update is that we still don't have a host for the July Blog Carnival Against Child Abuse. As survivors, we all need to keep learning and practicing our assertiveness skills and self-care. The blogger that I thought might step up and take over July has decided to take care of herself instead, and I commend her for that. Be looking in your e-mail inbox. I'm going to be sending out a memo to all carnival participants to give a "last-chance-for-first-time-hosts" invitation to everyone who has not already told me they cannot-at-this-time host or would like to host, but at a later date. If I don't get any takers on that, I'll be handing the July edition over to a previous host--Lisa at Sadly Normal and Megan at Imaginif have both offered.
Speaking of Megan and the carnival, Megan has tagged me with a meme. I know, I know: I haven't gotten around to a couple of the memes circulating as of late. This one, however, is something I've just got to participate in because it's a bloggers-changing-the-world sort of meme. Like The Thinking Blogger, this is also an award. I am almost speechless I'm so honored to receive this. Thank you, Megan, for nominating me--and recognizing the Blog Carnival Against Child Abuse--for and with this award! It's called Bloggers For Positive Global Change, and I'll be tagging five bloggers with it as I post this meme tomorrow. My son is at a three-day camp so I'll have time to do this. I've just got to narrow down my list to five. See ya then! :)
I'm pleased to say I'm holding at eight pounds lost. I've kept it off for over a week; no weight gain returning so far. (I'm no longer on this diet, but I've been making some "lifestyle" eating changes--that's what they say is the best strategy, right?) The thing that impressed me the most about this colon cleanse and diet (in addition to the fabulous relief of not feeling bloated all the time anymore) is the inches that melted away. On this program, they want you to measure yourself in the beginning and then again on day 11. In my last post I mentioned what I shock I had with measuring myself for the first time in years. On day 11, however, I got such a pleasant surprise!
I wouldn't have thought it possible in only 10 days with just eight pounds lost, but I got rid of some girth! I lost a half-inch each on my upper arms and bust; there was 3/4 of an inch each off my chunky upper thighs and waist; and most impressive of all--drum roll, please--was an inch and a 1/2 off my hips (including the lovely "love handle" area and gut). I still was not quite believing this until I noticed the change in how some of my clothes feel. Ya know, the clothes don't lie. Now, I can pull my waist band out from around my tummy like those models on the commercials do, and I've noticed some loose material around the rear end of my pants and shorts. Hooooraaayy!
Okay, enough about that. Thanks for indulging me.
The other thing that happened was the old, familiar survivor pattern that goes something like this: "Hey, you're feeling so much better, so good right now. You're probably up for a new abuse memory. You can handle it. Check it out!" Then, WHAM! A new part or memory taps me on the shoulder (or, more likely, bangs me over the head or kicks me in the ass). I may do a post on this therapy work later. Luckily, my cooperative part (her name is Samantha), my therapist and I did some great feelings work together and I feel better again. Thankfully, there is often relief after the hard recovery work.
Now, another update is that we still don't have a host for the July Blog Carnival Against Child Abuse. As survivors, we all need to keep learning and practicing our assertiveness skills and self-care. The blogger that I thought might step up and take over July has decided to take care of herself instead, and I commend her for that. Be looking in your e-mail inbox. I'm going to be sending out a memo to all carnival participants to give a "last-chance-for-first-time-hosts" invitation to everyone who has not already told me they cannot-at-this-time host or would like to host, but at a later date. If I don't get any takers on that, I'll be handing the July edition over to a previous host--Lisa at Sadly Normal and Megan at Imaginif have both offered.
Speaking of Megan and the carnival, Megan has tagged me with a meme. I know, I know: I haven't gotten around to a couple of the memes circulating as of late. This one, however, is something I've just got to participate in because it's a bloggers-changing-the-world sort of meme. Like The Thinking Blogger, this is also an award. I am almost speechless I'm so honored to receive this. Thank you, Megan, for nominating me--and recognizing the Blog Carnival Against Child Abuse--for and with this award! It's called Bloggers For Positive Global Change, and I'll be tagging five bloggers with it as I post this meme tomorrow. My son is at a three-day camp so I'll have time to do this. I've just got to narrow down my list to five. See ya then! :)
Labels: blog carnivals, Bloggers For Positive Global Change, diet, meme, memory work, therapy, Thinking Blogger Awards, weight-loss
May 04, 2007
Look Who's Got Me Thinking!
Since The Thinking Blogger Awards is, in fact, a meme, I'm supposed to award and tag bloggers who make me think as well. According to the rules at The Thinking Blog, I can only give out five awards. This is a tall order for me. I decided to narrow down the blogs that make me think to the ones that I've been reading for quite a while--the blogs that have asserted the most power to make me think. I wish I could include more. I'm also wishing there was an award for the "feeling blogger," because I have many blogs I can think of that really make me feel and keep my heart open.
For now, however, I award the following blogs (in no particular order) with The Thinking Blogger Award and thank them for assisting me on my quest to always keep my mind open:
For now, however, I award the following blogs (in no particular order) with The Thinking Blogger Award and thank them for assisting me on my quest to always keep my mind open:
- Beautiful Dreamer could just as easily be called "beautiful writer." Beauty uses simile and metaphor the way I wish I consistently could: to weave words into the fabric of beautiful prose. Right now, Beauty is going through the aftermath of her son's critical accident and hospitalization. But, scroll down a few posts for some exquisitely eloquent writing--the reading will be worth it!
- Joel, at Pax Nortona, is quite the prolific and eclectic writer and thinking blogger. He's got posts on subjects ranging from all sorts of pop culture and current events, to mental health, to pets. He's not afraid to voice his opinion. I may not always agree with him, but he always makes me think and reminds me to keep my mind open. I also respect the fact that Joel is a fierce advocate for mental health and erasing the stigma of mental illness. He is a true champion to me.
- Austin, and the other system members of Morton's Pride at The People Behind My Eyes, probably gets me laughing as often as she gets me thinking. She really has a way of highlighting the irony and absurdity of life. Her writing often provides the relief of a huge belly laugh. Her artwork and writing also often provide me with a respite from life's ugliness. There is deep beauty here. Even her rants are well thought out, awareness-raising and humorous. She reminds me of something I have firmly believed for a long time: If we don't laugh at ourselves and life, and act a little crazy sometimes, we're at risk of really going crazy!
- Keepers is a thinking blogger and a thoughtful blogger in the giving sense. She is a true artist, in her writing as well as her visual artwork. She reaches out to others with honesty and compassion, always speaking her truth. And without honesty and truth, all the thinking and writing in the world just comes out flat. This is a full, well-rounded and utterly human (and humane) blog.
- April Optimist writes a blog for survivors called The Thriver's Toolbox. It gets the nod from me. Some may disagree with me and find her posts too pie-in-the-sky at times. I often disagree with April myself, especially when I'm too busy feeling sorry for myself. But, her advice--and the recovery and healing knowledge she shares--is well thought out and researched. The success that she holds out as hope comes from rising above in her own experience.
I am blessed to know these bloggers--through their writing as well as their friendship and support. You may want to get to know them yourself.
Labels: meme, open mind, Thinking Blogger Awards
February 03, 2006
Five on Friday Meme
I found this meme on The Daily Meme. It's from Five on Friday and here are the five questions for today:
- What did you want to be when you grew up? I wanted to be a stewardess--that's what they were called back then. Also, way back then, the airlines had height and weight requirements, etc.
- Did you follow through? If not, what happened? No, I certainly did not. My stubborn, rather feminist self decided I did not want to be a "waitress in the air" and deal with all the sexist b.s. that was involved at the time. I still love to travel, however, and have even been able to do some travel writing.
- Is your life turning out the way you thought it would when you were a kid? If not, is it better or worse? Much, much better. I was severely abused as a child (story at my website: www.survivorscanthrive.com) and did not hope for much at the time. As a kid, and young adult, I believe I subconsciously thought that I would marry anyone--no matter how abusive--who said they loved me. Now, I am married to a man who is very kind, loving and supportive of me and my recovery from abuse. As a kid, I also had poor self-esteem and not much confidence in my abilities. Today, I believe I'm a talented writer and am able to move people with my work.
- Paradoxes aside, if you could time-travel back to when you were 10 years old, what would you tell your 10-year-old self? This question reminds me of the movie, The Kid, with Bruce Willis, except that story involved an eight-year-old kid who traveled forward in time to help out the adult. I would give similar advice that was used in the movie, as in something like, "Everything's going to be alright." I would also tell my child self: "You are beautiful. You are unique. You are precious and worthy. You have so much to give and to get out of your life. You go, girl!"
- Do you think the child you were would like the adult you've become? I think the child I was craved an adult like me! I am affectionate and loving. I am accepting, compassionate and understanding. I try to give these gifts to my own offspring, and I think he appreciates being loved no matter what.
Labels: meme, Survivors Can Thrive
