September 17, 2008
...On the Way to The Blog Carnival Against Child Abuse...
Well, well, well. I feel like I just woke up from one of those dreams where I'm about to enter a classroom for a final exam I haven't studied one lick for...
...and I discover I'm naked in front of everybody!
I'm feeling embarrassed and a bit like a chastised child.
I had one of the biggest dissociative "episodes" of my life, that I'm aware of any way. It started as we were coming back from our family vacation, just before the new school year began. I think Logan Airport, in Boston--where I'd only been once, on a business trip--was one of the triggers that set it all off. I feel like I'm just now almost completely done "coming down" from the whole dissociative nightmare...I mean, detour...like some kind of really frightening drug or something.
It scared my son so much that he, literally, was like, "Who are you and what have you done with my Mommy?" We're going to see my therapist together today, for "the talk." No, not the "sex talk." This will be the talk where we explain "what's wrong with Mom" to my beloved offspring. I've really resisted the urge to give him "too much information" up to this point; a lesson I learned from my sister as she tried to explain things years ago to her two young children. But, my therapist has worked with dissociative clients for over 20 years and I know she will be a big help. I hope this will assuage some of his fears and help him not worry so much.
So, anyway. The hiatus for the Blog Carnival Against Child Abuse is supposed to be over, right? I think the deadline for submissions was supposed to be today for a Friday post here, at Survivors Can Thrive! I've been to Blog Carnival dot com a couple of times today and the site is down. See the widget as you scroll down my sidebar? It's messed up.
Ah well, maybe that's a good thing, ya know? I think what I'd like to do anyway is extend the deadline for submissions and run the Carnival on Monday. Would you all be cool with that? As soon as the BC site is back up and I can log in, I'll go and change the dates. So, we have a little breathing room. Aaahhhh...that sounds nice, doesn't it? ;)
How 'bout we make the theme for the September Carnival something about Fall, Summer coming to an end, Transitions, or something like that. I should be able to come up with my own post about this time of year, as it always seems to hold great trauma-related/dissociative surprises for me. I still haven't figured out exactly what it's about. It's not like it's a specific "anniversary" or anything. It seems to sneak up as early as the middle of August, and have the potential to bite me in the ass until about mid-October. Fun, huh? Oh well. At least, this time, I was able to stay out of the hospital. That's improvement, right?
On another Blog Carnival Against Child Abuse note: I don't want to abandon the carnival that I founded and maintain. But, I'm looking for an extended break of sorts. What I'd like to look for supporters for is this idea: I want Carnival participants and past hosts to think about "managing" the Carnival in a guest-like, long-term stint for a commitment of six months to a year. I will still promote the Carnival at my blog and around the survivor-thriver community and submit my own posts. I'm hoping this will help our carnival stay on a month-by-month basis of continuity. Anybody willing out there? Please comment and/or leave me an e-mail message if you'd be interested. Thanks, all!
And get those September/Fall BLOG CARNIVAL AGAINST CHILD ABUSE submissions in. As soon as Blog Carnival is back up, I'll insert the submission form for you to use here.
Glad to see you back. (((hugs))) on the episode in Boston. I'm glad you will be able to have your therapist help explain to your son what's going on.
peace and blessings
(((((((safe hugs to all))))))))