May 20, 2008

 

I'm Finally "In" My Body And Now It's Falling Apart!

Whoa! I was all set to put up a very positive, fun, upbeat post...and then I got a phone call that stopped me in my tracks.

*&*^%$##@*! I have skin cancer!

I had two "moles" removed about a week ago and just got the biopsy results. I'm way more upset about it than I thought I would be.

Boy, life sure is ironic, isn't it? The positive, upbeat post I was going to write was about pleasant surprises and thoughtful friends and peaceful, grounding connected-to-the-earth time spent gardening lately.

I've lived in Colorado almost ten years now. I love it here. One of the things I love the most is the sunshine. With spring finally here, I feel like a new person. I've been outside enjoying getting my hands in the soil and planting things. We get over 300 days of sunshine a year here.

Unfortunately, this has led to my skin cancer, most likely. A strange bump showed up about four years ago--that was five years into living in Colorado. At first I thought it was a wart. Then, I was convinced it was a new-to-show-up mole.

Turns out, it's a basal cell carcinoma. I've been crying some this morning, but I feel a bit better after googling the skin cancer type I have. I guess the recovery rate is excellent for the type of cancer I have and the type of surgery they are going to do on me. It's called The Mohs procedure, or Mohs Micrographic Surgery. They've got me scheduled for Wednesday, 5/28. Unfortunately, the full recovery rates they give are for early treatment. My "mole" was left on there for four years! Yikes! That's scary.

Also, unfortunately, this nasty bump is on my face--right next to my eye! (It's kinda between the corner of my eye and my nose.) Now I'm not a high maintenance sort of woman. I have a very easy wash-and-go hairstyle, am not really into fashion and I hardly ever wear makeup. (I do, however, wear sunscreen all the time.)

Of all the damn moles I have all over my body, this nasty cancer has to be right on my face. (The other one, which is not cancerous at all, was on my leg.) I guess I am actually that vain that this bothers me a lot. Also, I have a neighbor who has skin cancer and it's really bad and he's quite disfigured from it. He's in his 70's though. I'm not even 50 yet!

Aaaaccckkk! Between this and my recent diagnosis of Thoracic Outlet Syndrome, I feel like my body is falling apart! Hhhmmmmm....I'm not sure I like this "being in my body" stuff that is so new to me. Hey, say a prayer or two will ya? Thanks!

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Comments:
Of Course I will say some prayers for you Marj. I am so sorry for your news. I will e thinking of you.

{{{{Marj}}}}
 
Kahless: Thank you a lot for the prayers and hugs. You are a dear.
 
so can yuou tell us whta they are going to be doing for treatment and you bet praying is something we are getting good at
 
Prayers, prayers, all over the place!

"Please heal the cancer on Marj's face..."

This would be a scary thing to contend with, I don't blame you for being shaken up.

Hang in there, Marj. We're all here for you!
 
Dear Marj

you are definitely in our thoughts, heart and prayers! We are sorry for all you are going through but we know somehow you will persevere

peace and blessings

keepers
 
I am so sorry to hear of this, its the last thing you need. you are in my thoughts
 
Hey sweets. Praying for you. Basal cells are never fatal. They don't spread to the lymph system.

It's the melanoma's that can be fatal.

I've had 4 precancerous basal cells and 1 actual melanoma. My melanoma was square on the center of my nose.

I have a huge scar ..but I appear to be the only one who notices it. It was noticable for the first couple of months, but that's it.

I think the big thing is, that is in my line of vision ... the scar actually reflects light, so it bothers me a bit. Guess I could cover it with make up, just thought of that. LOL

The C word is scarier than all get out .... it's ok to freak out. It really is. Just know you're being prayed for while you're freaking out ... hugs.

oh, this is Pk from Pearls And Dreams ... I started a new blog and forgot to sign in under my real ID ...
 
Wow! What an outpouring of bloggy wisdom, support, love and empathy. You guys rock!

I feel a bit better today after getting more info about the skin cancer and having the shock wear off a bit.

Thanks everybody!
 
Oh, BTW, JIP:

If you click on the link about the Mohs surgery, you can read a pretty good explanation of the treatment/procedure that I'm going to be experiencing a week from today.

I guess it's one of the best options for this type of thing.

Thanks for the prayers! And for what you wrote on my fridge. You're sweet! :)
 
You'll be in my prayers.
 
Hey, PK (30 years from Darling):
So glad to "see" you again. Thanks for all the first-hand info. I really appreciate it. I do feel much calmer about the whole thing today. I'll have to get over and check out your new blog--cool! :) (((((PK)))))

Survivor: Thanks for the prayers. And thanks for visiting! It's always nice to meet another survivor (not that I'm glad we were victims--but I'm sure glad we're survivors!)
 
Marj,

Huge (((((hugs))))) and prayers!
 
I have a friend who has had repeated problems with skin cancer(from being a sunworshipper as a child and all through her life) and several on her face. She even lost the tip of her nose. I must say she looks great. If I didn't know better I wouldn't even know she'd had all those surgeries. So don't worry too much about a mole on your face. They are doing great things with reconstructive stuff now days. Your neighbor is the exception from what I understand.

I will definitely add you to my prayer list and I'll be thinking of you on your surgery day and those following. Just imagine all of your cyber friends circled around you looking out for you cause that's where we'll be. Maybe that will offer some comfort.
 
I'm so sorry to hear of your health issues, Marj. I will definitely pray for you.

I met a woman at a lunch recently that had the same type of skin cancer, also on her face. (Too many years in the sun). She had it removed and after it healed up, it did not leave a visible scar. She doesn't wear face make-up and you cannot see where it was removed.

I don't know if she used one of those scar reducer creams on it, but you can ask your doctor about that, and when it would be OK to start using one. They're available, OTC, at your local pharmacies.

Sending lots of positive energy and healing thoughts to you! (((Hugs))) MW
 
I am so sorry to hear of this! My mom had the Mohs and her mole was exactly the same location as yours. They will go as deep as they have to to get it all, that's the beauty of that procedure. My mom does not even have a noticeable scar and hers never came back, that was about 10 years ago.
 
April: Thanks for the hugs and prayers. I always appreciate you thoughtful compassion.

RR: Thanks for the info and prayers. I feel much better about the procedure. Now, I just need to convince my parts that we will be safe on Wednesday. I had a pretty bad trigger reaction the day I got the moles off for the biopsy. I'm supposed to hear from the Mohs doctor's secretary today about meeting him in person, seeing the room where the procedure will be done, etc. to help myself(ves) feel safe.

MW: so nice to "see" you again! I thought you weren't blogging right now. I'll have to go over and see what you're up to. Thanks so much for the healing energy, thoughts and hugs! :)

Barbara/Layla: Thanks for stopping by with your kind words. They are very reassuring to me.
 
I'm praying for you Marj! Even if we just met now. :)
 
Sorry to read this. Will keep you in my thoughts as well. I've worked with many who've had MOHS and had great cancer free recoveries. You will do just great, I know it!!!!!!!!!
 
Sakimichi: Nice to meet you, and thanks for the prayers!

Dr. Deb: Thanks for the vote of confidence. I'm sure you're right!
 
Angelina: thanks for visiting. Yes, the cancer topic is really just a sidenote on this particular blog. "SURVIVORS Can Thrive!" is really about child abuse and sexual abuse survivors. I hope you find the info you're looking for. Blessings to you.
 
Please check out EFT Emotional Freedom Technique...IT IS A MIRACLE and can miraculously cure all ailmetns...
You may be in your body, but your body is still storing the emotions...EFT will help you release them forever...
www.emofree.com
Do a serach! God Bless you!
 
Thanks for your concern and ideas, Anika. My former therapist taught me a lot of EFT and TFT techniques, many of which I still use on a regular basis today. I do find some fo them quite helpful. Blessings to you, as well.
 
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