February 10, 2009
Diggin' In The Dirt
Dealing with a lot of mucky guck these days. You know, I don't go looking for this crap--it usually sneaks up and bites me in the butt--but, I'm glad I now have my therapy shovel to help dig myself out when I need to.
I mentioned the Coach Creative Space ning/network a couple of posts back, right? Well there's a pretty active group of people writing poetry on there. There's even a group that writes haiku. I've only dabbled in this form of poetry. Since I'm a nature nut, it's a good fit for me. And the short form can be very powerful.
I wrote a poem a few days ago about digging dirt. You can take it either way: It's a poem about connecting to the earth through gardening; and/or It's a poem about "digging up" memories, etc. in the process of healing. I guess I'm still in the throes of the "both/and" of life.
Digging Dirt
I am digging dirt
the earth, it does connect me
scent of remembrance
Copyright 2009 Marj McCabe~All rights reserved.
I hadn't thought about it in a long while. But, this poem reminded me of a Peter Gabriel song. Back when I really started dealing with my child abuse--and my inner child--in therapy, I couldn't connect with any feelings I had about my abuse and about that little girl I used to be. I think her pain just scared me too much at first.
My therapist at the time wanted me to do some anger work. Me, angry? No way! I don't have feelings, right? Well, one of the ways I finally got in touch with some anger is to listen to music, especially music that had lyrics that spoke to me. I remember listening to lot of Sarah McLachlan at the time. And I would listen to Peter Gabriel's "Digging in the Dirt" over and over until I got in touch with that anger. I like the lyrics, "Digging in the dirt. To find the places we got hurt." Yeah.
I mentioned the Coach Creative Space ning/network a couple of posts back, right? Well there's a pretty active group of people writing poetry on there. There's even a group that writes haiku. I've only dabbled in this form of poetry. Since I'm a nature nut, it's a good fit for me. And the short form can be very powerful.
I wrote a poem a few days ago about digging dirt. You can take it either way: It's a poem about connecting to the earth through gardening; and/or It's a poem about "digging up" memories, etc. in the process of healing. I guess I'm still in the throes of the "both/and" of life.
Digging Dirt
I am digging dirt
the earth, it does connect me
scent of remembrance
Copyright 2009 Marj McCabe~All rights reserved.
I hadn't thought about it in a long while. But, this poem reminded me of a Peter Gabriel song. Back when I really started dealing with my child abuse--and my inner child--in therapy, I couldn't connect with any feelings I had about my abuse and about that little girl I used to be. I think her pain just scared me too much at first.
My therapist at the time wanted me to do some anger work. Me, angry? No way! I don't have feelings, right? Well, one of the ways I finally got in touch with some anger is to listen to music, especially music that had lyrics that spoke to me. I remember listening to lot of Sarah McLachlan at the time. And I would listen to Peter Gabriel's "Digging in the Dirt" over and over until I got in touch with that anger. I like the lyrics, "Digging in the dirt. To find the places we got hurt." Yeah.
Labels: anger, feelings, haiku, poem, Poetry, song lyrics, therapy
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JIP: Yeah, it still scares me a lot sometimes. But, I'm learning to deal with it, just like all the other emotions.
Enola: It is a great metaphor, isn't it? I guess that's why I'm drawn to it.
Enola: It is a great metaphor, isn't it? I guess that's why I'm drawn to it.
Great poem! I, too, am a poet. My entire MFA thesis is comprised of poems that were me going through the muck, as you say. It's very interesting now that I have healed from PTSD to look back at the poems and watch my progress through the pain of memory. I just posted one of the poems this week, too. Must be a week for poems!
Re: my post "10 Reason You Don't Want to Talk, And the One Reason You Really, Really Should' -- of course you can have it for the carnival! Let me know whenever you're ready to use it. We're all in this together. :)
Re: my post "10 Reason You Don't Want to Talk, And the One Reason You Really, Really Should' -- of course you can have it for the carnival! Let me know whenever you're ready to use it. We're all in this together. :)
# posted by 
: February 11, 2009 6:21 AM
: February 11, 2009 6:21 AM
Thanks, Michelle. I'm hoping to get a new edition host for next month, so, hopefully, I'll let you know soon. I think I'll check back and take a look at that poem of yours, too!
digging in dirt can lead to great things my friend. Remember as a child all the treasures u found in the dirt? You may find some worms or an occasional bone... But it's all an adventure.. And when you find yourself tapping into that anger just stand up, make yourself a mud ball and throw it! You like my metophoric way of speaking? ;-)
Safe hugs to you girl. Remember.... There are people in the world that make beautiful homes out of mud and dirt...
Safe hugs to you girl. Remember.... There are people in the world that make beautiful homes out of mud and dirt...
Anger is an especially difficult emotion for women. It doesn't mean that you don't feel anything if you have trouble with that one; just that you're human. I'm also digging in the dirt these days.
Hey, Karma! Wonderful to "see" you! You must have ESP. I meant to come visit your blog yesterday, but then the Therapy Day got in the way. I'll swing over today and see what you're "digging up."
this is an amazing post. sorry for what you are dealing with, i get it. i am here, haven't been reading much, but i am back. sorry to have missed you, thanks for writing.
LaQuisha: Thanks for the visit and the comment...AND your interest in the blog carnival. I'm hoping to get a new host for another edition that would run in March. I'll come to your blog and give you some details.
Mile 191: Thanks for the support. I know we ALL have our own dirt to deal with...and sometimes that alone is more than enough! I'm glad you're back. I'll swing by your blog.
Mile 191: Thanks for the support. I know we ALL have our own dirt to deal with...and sometimes that alone is more than enough! I'm glad you're back. I'll swing by your blog.
Durn it! (As my old granny used to say). LaQuisha's comment was on the blog carnival post, one down. I guess my brain is still mucked up with dirt! ;P
I enjoyed your poem. I used to write a lot of poetry but haven't been able to find my words and emotions in a long time.
Anonymous Drifter: Thanks for stopping by with your comment. I find, for me, I have these really productive periods where poems are just "showing up" and then I have really long, dry spells. I hope you get back to your poetry sometime and share with us.
Kahless: Hi! So nice to "see" you! Yes, I don't know anything about music--don't know how to read it, never learned to play an instrument--but it certainly does move me.
Sorry, RR!
Thanks, April. I betcha you have at least one therapy shovel in that thriver's toolbox of yours. ;)
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Thanks, April. I betcha you have at least one therapy shovel in that thriver's toolbox of yours. ;)
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