December 22, 2007
I've Created a "Survivor Needs" Meme
I know! Let's make a list for ourselves and do it as a meme.
I've created a list of "Survivor Needs" and I've arranged them from 1-25, like an advent calendar counting down to the 25th day of December. I've also sprinkled in a few things that I, as a survivor and a human, just want! For your own list, maybe you need to pretend it's not the holidays. Maybe you can't tolerate touch (even cyber hugs), but you want some healing vibes sent your way. Maybe you don't feel comfortable telling your story, but you want others to know you are a survivor and not feel so alone.
This is your chance to communicate your own, personal survivor needs.
You don't have to wait to get tagged with this meme. Grab it and post a list of your own! Let's focus some attention on self care this holiday season...with an emphasis on getting our needs met in the New Year.
My Survivor Needs
As a survivor trying to thrive:
- I need PEACE.
- I need some sleep!
- I need to feel safe in the shower and in my bed.
- I need rapport and effective work with a good therapist who cares.
- (Although I've often tried to do without them) I need anti-depressant meds and something for anxiety and sleep when I need it.
- I need to be silly and have some fun once in a while.
- I need to do safe, healthy anger work.
- I need to get in touch with my feelings.
- I need to be in my body.
- I need safe touch with trusted others and safe cyber hugs.
- I need to tell my story and know that I'm not alone.
- I need to advocate for and connect with other survivors, and raise awareness about sexual violence and abuse.
- I need soft, warm jammies, slipper socks, blankets, hoodies and throws.
- I need non-sexual touch and affection with my husband.
- I need to exercise assertiveness, boundaries and communication with others to keep myself safe.
- I need to get out in nature and know that all can be right with the world.
- I need to hold my child and feel his soft cheek against mine.
- I need a warm, furry pet.
- I need to comfort and re-parent my inner child.
- I need to renew my commitment to breaking the cycle...every day.
- I need to stay away from most of my family of origin--they are toxic!
- I need to continue to work on a healthy relationship with my sister.
- I need healthy self-esteem.
- I need to know that I am worth good things and I deserve them!
- I need to let you know that you're not alone either--I'm here and I care.
And, I also want (but don't necessarily need and/or might not ever have):
- I want coffee!
- I want chocolate!
- I want a cigarette (but I'm not going to have one).
- I want a pill that would eliminate my nightmares.
- I want to end all forms of sexual violence and child abuse everywhere, forever.
Rules of the "Survivor Needs" Meme:
- Please link back to this post so people can see the origins of the meme, get ideas for their own self-care list, see who's already been tagged, and maybe we can track how far this meme goes.
- List 25 needs and five wants. Try to restrict your needs list to things that have to do with being a survivor of some sort of abuse, assault, etc. Your wants list can be anything...you want!
- Use this list to remind yourself to get your needs met this holiday season and in the New Year.
- Pass on the meme and tag five people to play the meme with you. (I get to tag a few extra folks because, well, I started the meme, okay?)
- Patricia Singleton at Spiritual Journey of a Lightworker
- Enola Survivor
- Lynn at Spilling Ink in Public
- Matthew at Loving Awareness
- Mike at Child Abuse Survivor
- Megan at Imaginif
- Marcella at Abyss2Hope
- Annaleigh at As Waters Passing By/Blessed Fearscapes
- Memory Artist
- Karma at Jew Exploring Buddhism
Note: Please don't be insulted if you don't see your name on this list. I've left some bloggers off on purpose because I want to give you the chance to tag (and I know you will anyway) each other.
I just noticed the pingback in my incoming links. My blog was set to private for a couple of days. I NEEDED some privacy.
Thank you for including me. I'm not so good about memes, but I like this one. I'm going to give it some thought.
It's hard to say what I need as I seem to have everything I need. A little more peace I suppose.
Right now it appears I've set up something perfect for myself for growth and transformation. Just not for stability. :-) I got let go from my job, a weird and serious illness probably related to the sexual abuse that keeps me from working, and with it, an incredible amount of memories coming up for clearing. Memories of being strangled, body convulsions, all that. So a lot going on!
Since I am relatively new to blogging about incest and reading articles on other blogs, the only blogging survivors that I know are already on your list so I won't tag anyone else. I will write my own list but it will be when I get back from my travels for Christmas. Have a Merry Christmas.
Denise: thanks for stopping by. I'm glad you liked the list.
Karma: I'm glad the list was helpful and I'm so glad you've had such good "luck" with ending nightmares!
What a great list you posted! I smiled in recognition a number of times. Fortunately my daughter knows me well and did give me chocolate for Christmas.
I'm going to work on mine and link back to you. I will post it in a few days. Thank you for creating this meme.
All this talk of chocolate is making me want to go there right now!
Merrry Christmas to you, too!
Kahless: I'm glad you like the list. The last time I had a smoke was in September. I can't tell you how many times I've quit smoking. It's kinda rediculous. We'll see how long I go this time. I'm not getting any younger and I wanna quit for good. ;)
Thanks for tagging me for this meme.
Those were great. I think in stressful times, we need to learn how to stop, look and listen to what *we* need.
Deb: "Stop, Look & Listen" you say? Using our senses? That means being IN our bodies. Good idea.
Sorry for the delay, but I finally did the meme today.
Power to all of us. We have survivied. Mxxx
Check this list out, folks! It--and it's writing--are truly amazing. Power to us is right! Megan, your power feels contagious!
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